Losing this life for Jesus

Have you ever read Malachi 3:10?  Well, it says this, “ Bring the whole tithe into my storehouse, so that there may be food in My house, and test me now in this, ‘ says the Lord of hosts,’ if I will not open for you the windows of heaven and pour out for you a blessing until it overflows.”  Do you get the impression here that God is smiling, daring you to try and out- give Him? I do, and it gives me chills. This is how I see this scripture in my mind (and as a girl, sorry guys!). Ok, it’s like being invited to a ball. You are standing by the wall looking radiant, calm and collected in your gown, but inside you are quivering with anticipation. Is He coming? Will He ask you to dance? You’ve already told Him you skipped out on ballroom dancing classes, so you are going to be a little lost, and you’re probably going to step on His toes! Then, He comes. There is no hesitation, no fear in His perfect love for you, and as you take the extended hand He offers to you, you are pleasantly surprised when He sweeps you off your feet ( hidden by your long dress), and places your feet on top of His for this dance that He knows the steps to… Just like when you were a child, and your Dad walked around the kitchen, with you clinging to his legs and standing on his feet. Ok, so if you are a girl you KNOW what I am talking about. If you’re a guy, I think you get the picture. I believe, with everything in my being, that God has called us to a life of love. A life lived knowing that, when we are living like He created us to live and loving like He loved, we are free. He even places our feet on top of His in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8, when He gives us instructions on how to love like He does. I was challenged recently to place my name in the “love” part of this passage, and it really convicted me when I got through all four of those verses. “ Joie, is kind and patient…”.  Ok, I think you know what I am talking about, and really, I am none of those things, but have you tried to BE love in this passage before? What does that look like for you? And this is what we are called to do, how we are called to live and love one another, regardless of where we are or what we are doing. An example of this in my own life is work, my job. To understand this completely, I should explain that I am a Pediatric Home Health nurse, basically a high-stress, glorified, babysitting position, where I am usually either sitting and monitoring patients, or running around like a chicken with my head chopped off.  Recently, I was placed on night shift, yes, the eleven to seven awesomeness shift! Three days a week, in addition to school, family and whatever else keeps me busy throughout the week. Two words for this situation come to mind: A LOT! After some prayer, and asking Jesus to help me view this through my, “Jesus lens,” another two words came to mind: NIGHT WATCH. How many people do you know, get paid to stay up through the night to pray for other people? This girl does. Of course I am going to be doing my job, to the best of my ability, but really, what better way to look at this situation? I don’t know yet why, but maybe it is to pray for you? And maybe it’s because He is preparing me for something he has prepared and planned later on down the road for me. I don’t know, but He does.

Ok, so really, there is a reason you are reading this extremely long blog! It is because I would really like to ask you to join me in prayer, yet again, for Haiti. For Jesus. Haiti. Me. I don’t understand what He is doing in my heart, much like I don’t completely understand the , “ night watch,” but I am pursuing Him, and a huge part of me feels pulled towards Haiti so I am going, and I am in much need of your prayers. My plan, is to not have a plan, but to surrender my life to Jesus, day by day, moment by moment and second by second. I’m sure you can relate! No five year plans for me!!! Part of this plan, for now, seems to be going back to Haiti for a little while, and I am rising to the offer and challenge, to try and out-give God. I am wanting to go for one month, the month of December, to try and pour out of this vessel what God has seen fit to overflow with Himself.  This is why I need you to pray. So, as you pray for me, please pray for me to give my all to Jesus and to follow Him with reckless abandon. I need you to earnestly pray that my faith will be sure and strong, my ears ready to hear, my eyes ready to see and my heart ready to receive and discern. As always, you can be sure that I am praying for you as Jesus leads me to, and that I am full of His love towards you. As I am on my, “night watch,” I will be praying for you sincerely and earnestly.